6 Books to Make You a Better Writer (and Human)
A list of titles, why I love them, and why I think you'll love them too.
Hi everyone, today we’re talking about books!
I like to read a few at once. Most recently it’s a combination of YA fiction, memoir, and almost always, a book on writing. Reading about writing is one of my greatest pleasures and I’m so excited to share some of my favorite titles with you here.
This idea came from my friend Stephanie. For the last week I’ve been sending her pictures of random pages from some of the books below, pointing to a specific sentence or paragraph that I think she’ll like. She suggested that I share this love with my readers, who, she wondered, might also be writers or artists or creative people? So here we are.
In pulling this list, I asked myself: Why do I love reading about writing so much?
Put simply: It makes me feel more connected and less alone. I also see it as a deeply generous act on the writer’s part. For a writer to open themselves up and share what the work feels like for them, to invite us into those quiet moments at their desk or on the floor or wherever they work, it’s a gift of intimacy. I feel closer to these writers after reading how they work than I do after reading about other personal details of their lives.
This love is different and more pure, I think, than obsessing over another writer’s process. In my recent conversation with Haley Jakobson, we talked about how many of us often fixate on other writer’s processes, searching for tips and tricks and fun little anecdotes that we think will spring us into writerly success. I confessed to her about how, in my most epic procrastination hours, I’ve found myself googling things like “Donna Tartt writing process.” (Spoiler alert lol no such thing exists!!!)
The desire behind those frantic Google sprees is often to make the challenge of writing go away, whereas reading about writing, not just the writing process but the writing life, makes me feel down for the challenge, even grateful for it.
These six books are the ones I reach for again and again. I don’t know if they’re the best books and they're certainly not the only books on writing, but they are the ones in my possession right now. They rotate on my desk, sitting with me while I write and read and refine my work, and I know that on any given page, I’ll find the connection and courage I need to keep going.
Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott
God, this book. I don’t remember how or when or where I first learned about its existence, but I do remember when my boss saw it on my desk one day and said, “I’m so glad you’re reading that.” I believe I bought it at the Housing Works bookstore on Crosby St in NYC. The $7 sticker is still on the back.
Each chapter in Bird by Bird is dedicated to some part of the writing journey, from “Getting Started” to “Perfectionism” to “Broccoli.” What does broccoli have to do with writing? Anne Lamott will tell you, along with other secrets and revelations and metaphors that make me feel less overwhelmed about not just my writing career, but my life.
In the chapter where the title comes from, she tells a story about when her brother was 10-years-old. He was writing a report about birds that he was assigned three months earlier, but now it was due the next day. Naturally he was in a fit of panic, surrounded by books and stray papers and pencils, “immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead,” Anne writes. “Then my father sat down beside him, put his arm around my brother’s shoulder, and said ‘Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.’”
BIRD BY BIRD, BUDDY? Incredible. If you hear me muttering this to myself at my desk every day…no you didn’t.
On Writing by Stephen King
I’m obsessed with the structure of this book. It has three forwards, all of them spunky and brief and vivid. The second one begins: “This is a short book because most books about writing are filled with bullshit. I figured the shorter the book, the less the bullshit.” Indeed, no bullshit here!
The first section is a memoir in listicle form (I love a list, there are 37 points!), where Stephen shows us how he became a writer. We see him writing weird stories as a kid, struggling to make it as an adult, getting sober even later. Then there’s a section called “Toolbox” which is, as you might suspect, about different tools writers can use to improve their stories…and in the end, he tells the miraculous tale of how he almost died in the middle of writing this very book. Did you know about Stephen King’s accident on the side of the road in Maine?? I did not. It’s a wild story and once you get to it, you see the previous pages in an entirely new light.
This book is particularly special to me because it’s the first recommendation I received from my friend
, who writes an awesome newsletter with book recommendations. Our friendship origin story is kind of a lesson on how to put yourself out there and make friends as an adult: I (my company) was her client in my last corporate job, and one day in a meeting she revealed that she was graduating with an MFA in Creative Writing the following week. I texted her on the side a few hours later (her number was in her email signature) to 1) congratulate her and 2) ask if she had any book recs from her MFA curriculum? I’m a writer too, I said, and would love to learn from anything you found helpful. She sent me like a 5-paragraph essay asking thoughtful questions about what I was looking for, but right off the bat recommended On Writing. Soon after that text, we started biweekly Zooms to chat about our writing. A friendship was born, you could say. (PSA: if she hadn’t been responsive to my texts I would have respected her space! Boundaries! But it was clear that we were both down to be friends.)How to Write an Autobiographical Novel by Alexander Chee
This book is not what I expected to be. It is so much better.